Do you ever wish you could go back in time and make a different choice? Regret. Guilt. Shame. These are three of the darkest emotions any human will ever experience. All of us feel these emotions at different points in our lives. You see, for many years I held a lot of pain in my heart, wishing I could’ve made better choices for myself and my girls, wishing that I was able to hit that delete button and start all over again.
I cried myself to sleep almost every night, not feeling happy with the decisions I made or was forced to make. All that hurt, guilt, shame, and regret put me in a dark place in my life. The longer I allowed myself to dwell in the land of regrets, the lower I allowed my self-esteem to become. One of my biggest struggles stemmed from the attachment of wanting my last relationship to be my forever. I had a hard time accepting that someone would hurt me yet again despite my past traumas. I became obsessed with the “woulda, shoulda, coulda” pattern of thinking, and was not able to see the opportunities that were right in front of me. Not only that, but I lost faith in my skills, my capabilities, and in myself.
Now fast-forward after experiencing pain, anger, and rejection I can now say I am who I am because of my past. I realized that you will not know light without darkness, love without pain, nor courage without fear. I learned that everything in life has a beginning and an ending. Furthermore, I needed to learn to forgive myself and let go of my past, so I can focus on my future and use my passion and talents to serve the world, rather than wasting time and energy dwelling on the mistakes I have made and who have hurt me.
So my advice to you is to stop being a prisoner of your past. It’s a burden that’s heavy to bear, and one that can cause you to destroy all chances of a happy future. Give yourself some space, reshape your thoughts, educate yourself, and prioritize your needs and your right to a better tomorrow.
“Stop being a prisoner of your past. Become the architect of your future.” – Robin Sharma